High potential kid and social relations

Interview of one : “I took a long time to consider that I had a real handicap. When I was a kid, I saw only benefits of being gifted. As an adult, I realized that this intelligence was generating a systematic social shift from which an existential suffering difficult to counteract”.

At what age were you diagnosed gifted and how old are you know ?

4 years old and I’m 37. 

What is your school path?

I was very bored at school but, thanks to being diagnosed, I always managed to adapt to the school environment. I skipped a class. I have 4 masters degree and 1 PhD (some gifted kids stop early school, this is not an indicator).

What was your relationship to others children ?

I thought the other kids were different. It was clear in my mind. The diagnosis of my giftedness probably helped me to better understand this difference between them and me and to have no problem of integration. I voluntarily did things that others did to do like them, like football. Football was a sport of recreation but also a knowledge.

Do you consider yourself disabled and why ? 

I took a long time to consider that I had a real handicap. When I was a kid, I saw only benefits of being gifted. As an adult, I realized that this intelligence was generating a systematic social shift from which an existential suffering difficult to counteract. I also found that in some practical aspects of life, I had inappropriate behaviors as if I was stupid.

What being gifted has entail in your private life ? 

I used to made irrational, dangerous and risky choices that were essentially motivated by the will and the obligation to escape from the mediocrity of life. Couples “classic” often gave me nausea, as they gave me the impression of a perfect conjunction of “practical” interests (like the cost per square meter, and this is not a joke) a contractualism quiet, clean, tidy and boring.

I used to want to escape that, preferring to make catastrophic decisions. This is also that to be gifted: not being able to make rational decisions of low intensity. Getting to grips with this aspect of giftedness takes time.

Do you think it’s easier to be with someone who is not gifted, that could be described as “normal” ?

I prefer to be with someone like me because even though we are all different, it exites a common base, which is a form of weird cognitive. Someone who knows his disability can say to the other : I don’t understand everything you do or say but I hear it because I know I’m also weird. Also, there is less chances to get bored with someone with the same “base” of cognitive.

For someone who is not gifted, it will, in principle, be much more difficult to accept the other. Also, I think an asymmetry seems delicate.

What is your relationship to other adults now ?

Not very different from the one I had as a child. It’s just easier for me to meet other people like me. The others bother me quickly. I don’t like small talk and I tend to switch to an ethnographer as soon as the conversation is too commonplace.

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